Copyright � 2006 by Reg Harris. All rights reserved.
My master's degree work in psychology focused on the psychological
processes behind the hero's journey pattern. More specifically,
I researched the nature and process of transformation. One
of the most interesting areas of exploration for me was
Gestalt therapy. Gestalt, more than any other psychological
theory, speaks to the transformational process we see in
the heroic journey. In the coming weeks I will focus on
several elements of Gestalt theory that give us greater
insight and understanding into the journey process. This
week, I introduce Gestalt's "paradoxical theory of
change," a theory that provides us a much deeper understanding
of the "stripping away" process in the trail of
challenges and the surrender, void, and no-self experience
in the abyss.
The "paradoxical theory of change," which was
identified and labeled by Albert Bessler, states that,
"change occurs when one becomes what he is, not
when he tries to become what he is not. Change does not
take place through a coercive attempt by the individual
or by another person to change him, but it does take place
if one takes the time and effort to be what he is �
to be fully invested in his current positions. By rejecting
the role of change agent, we make meaningful and orderly
change possible" (Bessler, 1970).
In other words, change in Gestalt therapy begins with the
idea that before we change, we must first be where and what
we are. Neither we nor others can force change or stimulate
change by insight. As poet David Whyte has said, any journey
must begin from where we are, from the situation in which
we find ourselves at this moment. In other words, for change
to begin we must surrender the dream of what we would like
to be because it is blocking us from being who we are. Bessler
writes, "The premise is that one must stand in one
place in order to have firm footing to move and that it
is difficult or impossible to move without that footing."
If we are in pain, for example and that pain is blocking
our lives, we can't change by intellectualizing on or analyzing
the pain. We must begin by embracing the pain (which is
where we are). "To heal a suffering," writes Proust,
"one must experience it to the full."
Only by being what and who one is can one become something
or someone else. Effort, self-control, or avoidance focused
exclusively on the future will not bring about change.
We must become our truth (ourselves) first before we can
move from it (change). Vice versa, if we try to be different
without finding what is true for us, we are following
someone else�s truth and will not bring about the
long-term change to which we aspire.... All the energy...locked
up in the battle between trying to change and resisting
change can become available for active participation in
our life processes (Kirchner, 2005).
While we would like to begin the change immediately, we
must first strip away all of those mechanisms that make
change impossible. In the context of the heroic journey,
this paradox emerges in the trail of challenges and temptations,
which forces us to focus on who we are in the here and now.
On our journey, every attempt to deal with challenges in
the old ways fails, and another layer of the psychological
armor we are wearing is peeled away. All of the avoidances--the
masks, manipulations, and self-deceptions--that we have
constructed to protect our egos are destroyed. Ironically,
while these avoidances protect us, they also prevent our
growth. By shielding us from that which we want to avoid,
they block us from the very process we need to take to free
ourselves from the pain and make change possible: we must
finish the unfinished business--process the pain, resolve
the conflict, and face the unthinkable.
Often this paradoxical process of going back so that we
can go forward involves the painful challenge of facing
old, unhealed wounds from our past. While nothing makes
this process easier, it is helpful to remember that we can
reinterpret a wounding so that it becomes the starting point
for growth. For this to happen, we must, as Jean Houston
writes, "ask the terrible and unavoidable questions:
'Where and by whom were you wounded?' and 'What or who is
trying to be born in you from that wound' (1987, p. 108).
By answering those questions, we can embrace who and what
we are; we can use the pain as a springboard to growth and
freedom.
Transition does not require that you reject or deny the
importance of your old life, just that you let go of it.
�honor the old life for all that it did for you.
It got you this far. It brought you everything you have.
But now�although it may be some time before you
are comfortable actually doing so�it is time for
you to let go of it. Your old life is over (Bridges, 2001,
p. 16).
This process of surrender (of avoidances), awareness (of
who and where we really are) and release (of the old ways
of being) is evident in literature and film. Two good examples
are the films Groundhog Day and The Air Up
There. In both cases, the main characters must go through
the painful process of releasing their illusions and fantasies.
Phil Conners (GHD) must relinquish his egocentrism and manipulations,
and Jimmy Dolan (Air) must release his past and the unfinished
business that is shackling him. Eventually, both characters
arrive at the essence of what and where they are. Only then
� in the void, the abyss � is revelation and
transformation possible. The moment of transformation is
clear in both cases. Phil Conners, who has grown tired of
the isolation created by his old self, says, "I've
killed myself so many times I don't exist any more."
Jimmy Dolan finally releases his illusions of greatness
and privilege, shouting, "I'm nothing. I'm a has-been.
I'm an assistant coach." With those admissions the
characters arrive at the abyss. They are fully aware, fully
accepting, and they ripe for change.
The wonderful thing about this "ripeness" is
that when we are ready, we don't have to try to change.
Change is not an effort. Gestalt tells us that awareness,
full awareness, leads to spontaneous change. With awareness
comes an "Aha!" experience, in which we suddenly
understand and become someone new; we construct a new "gestalt,"
a new self or personal narrative.
Often this process really is a way of "catching up."
Bridges (2001) writes, "�in a sense we are ripe
for the experience because we are a little (in some cases,
a lot) behind the curve of our own development" (p.
36). We are running what Bridges called a "transition
deficit." In narrative terms, the story we are does
not match the story we are living or want to live. Frequently
this is why not changing is more painful than changing.
We sense the potentials in our life and want to pursue them,
but the unfinished business of our past holds us back. The
pain arises when we feel our lives slipping away from us,
often giving rise to bitterness and anger that we project
onto the people and situations in our lives.
This is why the first step in change is not a going forward,
but a going back: Gestalt's paradoxical theory of change.
In order to change we must quit trying to change and simply
be who and where we are. With that awareness, we can fully
experience and explore whatever is blocking us. As this
exploration deepens through living in the here and now,
we free ourselves from our past, and the change that had
been impossible for us emerges spontaneously and authentically.
This is also the paradox of the heroic journey. The first
stage of the journey is not a going forward, but a going
backward, back to who and what we really are. Then, from
that firm footing, we can gradually begin to move forward
again, embracing our potentials because we are no longer
encumbered by the baggage of our past.
References
Bessler, Arnold (1970). The paradoxical theory of change.
Originally published in Fagan and Shepherd (Ed.), Gestalt
Therapy Now. NY: Harper Colophon. Retrieved from: http://www.gestalt.org/arnie.htm
Bridges, William (2001). The way of transformation:
embracing life's most difficult moments. Cambridge,
MA: Perseus Publishing.
Houston, J. (1987). In search of the beloved: Journeys
in mythology and sacred psychology (1st ed.). New York:
Jeremy P. Tarcher/Putnam.
Kirchner, Maria. Gestalt therapy theory: An overview. 2005.
Retrieved from: http://www.g-gej.org/4-3/theoryoverview.html.
